This query is from an anonymous author for the novel Guardian. Thank you, Anonymous, for the honour of allowing me to work on and post this!
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ORIGINAL QUERY
Emma sees things other people don’t.
It was cute when she was five, but after a certain age, girls who see visions are no longer imaginative. They are either crazy or possessed.
Sixteen-year-old Emma Hawthorne thought she had her gift under control, until the night her best friend drowned. Crippled by grief, she is no longer able to resist the barrage of emotions from the people around her – or the visions the emotions trigger.
Emma feels a faint flicker of hope when her childhood friend Gabriel returns for the summer. Even after five years apart, they are immediately drawn to one another. His calm presence allows her to begin to heal, but as their innocent friendship kindles into something more, Emma’s nightmarish visions start to become real.
Suddenly thrown into the centuries old conflict between the Guardians, a secret order dedicated to protecting mankind from the supernatural, and a creature known as a Soul-Eater, Emma must learn to trust Gabriel or loose everything she holds dear.
With her soul, and the souls of the people she loves at stake, Emma is forced to embrace her gift, in spite of the pain it causes her, or accept an immortal, painless existence with the Soul-Eater – and whatever choice she makes, her relationship with Gabriel will never be the same.
GUARDIAN is a 64,000 YA paranormal fantasy.
Thank you for your time and consideration.
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GOBLIN-EDIT
It was cute when she was five, but at sixteen, Emma Hawthorne needs to keep her visions under control or everyone will think she's crazy. When her best friend drowns, however, Emma's grief leaves her vulnerable to the barrage of emotion from people around her as well as the visions those emotions trigger.
When her childhood friend Gabriel returns for the summer, Emma hopes his calm presence will bring her relief. Instead, their friendship kindles into something more, and Emma's nightmarish visions start to become real. [What does this mean, specifically? Is she having visions of future events that come true, or do her visions feature beings that begin appearing in the real world?]
[Reveal here who Gabriel is and how he ties in to Emma's gift becoming more dangerous. Is he a member of the Guardians? Was he using her?] [Something Gabriel does] draws Emma into the centuries-old conflict between a creature known as the Soul-Eater and the Guardians, a secret order dedicated to protecting mankind from the supernatural. Emma must learn to trust Gabriel [Didn't she already? What has he done recently to become untrustworthy?] or she and her family may lose their souls.
But the choice gets harder when the Soul-Eater promises to spare her family if Emma accepts the immortal, painless existence it can offer her--one blissfully free from her empathic gift. Emma must decide between [two things that are both good or two things that are both bad. Perhaps family and Gabriel's love versus the quiet peace of being alone in her own mind? Or a dangerous life spent fighting the Soul-Eater versus losing her identity forever?]
GUARDIAN is a 64,000 YA paranormal fantasy. Thank you for your time and consideration.
Goblin Caveat: Some elements that may not be accurate for the novel have been added to this edited version of the query.
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