This query is from Faraci for the novel World Book. Thank you Faraci for the honour of allowing me to work on and post this!
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ORIGINAL QUERY
Seth was good at following the rules. He obeyed his parents, performed his nightly vows, and observed the laws in the World Book with pride – until he met Kinessa.
The Kingdoms of the Land, Air, and Sea follow the World Book – a list of oppressive laws designed to keep peace throughout the Kingdoms. Kinessa, a thirteen-year-old stranger claiming to have amnesia, believes these laws need to change. When Seth’s family shelters Kinessa, her blatant disregard for the World Book initially frightens Seth, but he is intrigued by her rebellious ideas. For the first time he dares to explore the woods in his backyard and visit the ocean, but he faints from shock when Kinessa reveals she’s from the Kingdom of the Sea by changing into a sea serpent.
Kinessa tells Seth that she came to the land, a crime punishable by death, to spy on a secret meeting between the Kings and their heirs. Seth follows her to the meeting, but grows skeptical of her plan when she decides to convince the Crown Prince of the Air to join their side. The prince’s bloodthirsty nature leads to a deadly confrontation, and they barely escape with their lives. Kinessa comes up with another reckless plan and decides to start a revolution in the King’s City of the land. A few people begin to listen to their ideas, but when the Crown Prince catches up to them Seth must rely on his own intelligence and courage to save them all.
WORLD BOOK is a completed 32,000 word fantasy for middle grade readers.
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GOBLIN-EDIT
Seth has always obeyed his parents, performed his nightly vows, and observed the laws in the World Book with pride. However, when Seth's family provides shelter to Kinessa, a thirteen-year-old claiming to have amnesia, her blatant disregard for the World Book first frightens, then galvanises, Seth.
Kinessa believes the laws that keep peace between the kingdoms of Land, Air, and Sea need to change. Responding to the challenge of her views, Seth dares to explore the woods in his backyard and visit the ocean for the first time. However, when Kinessa changes into a sea serpent in front of him, Seth realizes his family's guest not only lied about her amnesia but has a broader plan.
Kinessa says she came from the Kingdom of the Sea to spy on a secret meeting between the rulers of the three kingdoms. When Seth follows her to that meeting, however, he sees Kinessa try to convince the Crown Prince of the Air to ally with the Sea. The prince instead attacks Kinessa, and even with Seth's intervention, they barely escape with their lives. Kinessa is undaunted and decides to start a revolution in the City of the Land, where the meeting took place. A few people begin to listen to her and Seth's ideas, but when the bloodthirsty Crown Prince of Air catches up to them, it's Seth's intelligence--and his new-found courage--that will save them all.
WORLD BOOK is a completed 32,000 word fantasy for middle grade readers.
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